so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
