She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
