Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
