Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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