She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
The best revenge is premature balding
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
