Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
