I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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