...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
