Pappa wants mamma naked
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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