i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
