I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
is wine microwaveable?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize