Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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