You're completely useless in the revolution.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
