update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Randomize
