Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
