we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
