Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Randomize