I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
