meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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