you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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