i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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