we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
