I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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