I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
