I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
My hand turned me down
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
someone owes me an orgasm
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
