two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
