he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
