My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
