ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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