FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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