Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
