they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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