we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
