Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Randomize
