oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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