i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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