Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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