I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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