I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
