"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
