rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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