How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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