I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Randomize
