Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
