you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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