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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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