I wish you could order shots online.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Be still, my beating vagina.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
