So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
