somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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