whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
